
A dear friend came to visit for awhile. We laughed, talked till the wee hours amidst lit candles, and ate heartily. We told each other stories about our personal lives and found out new things about one another. The difficulty of friendship today is that too often, people rush intimacies and wonder why their friendships do not last. But I was intrigued when my visitor acknowledged a detail and said: "That's something I didn't know," even though we have been acquainted for a few years. But his knowing now adds dimention to our friendship and it is a detail that will remain in his memory just as I will recall his own stories of his childhood, things that I had not heard before nor would have wanted to know until he was ready to share them. I would not have prompted them not because of a lack of curiosity but because the art of friendship means knowing what to ask and what not to ask. I am not able to do so flawlessly but art is in the attempt.